Saturday, April 1, 2017



My Thoughts Turn to You

I don’t think of you often, except when I do
a glimpse of a Klondike bar reminds me how
we used to buy those for you sugar-free
and the memory brings tears as if a violet
mist had suddenly formed in front of my eyes
other memories slide in pushing this one away
your smile a beacon reminding me of
sunrises we caught together the sky brightening
as purple clouds tinged with orange and the
sun peeked over the horizon
my sleepy eyes wanting the darkness to stay for
a few more hours so we could slip into bed

and now I skip the sunrises and the mornings
when your voice would be telling me current
events as you went about your routines
and I forced myself to wake and join you sometimes
so I could feel the energy you emoted
Or on days when I remained half asleep
you cooking eggs for yourself —the smell remaining
as a reminder of your presence
the pan and your utensils in the sink
left as remnants of your lonely repast
and now I sleep through sunrises and wake to the
middle of the day when morning is over
no smells of eggs loiter and thoughts of you are not present
except when I look around the room
and remember each day you are not here

and so the day begins as sunlight fills
the bedroom and I wish to slide under covers and
sleep until memories of your face and your voice
no longer flood my head and the stark reminders
of your loss are not around my space
And though I kid myself into believing
I can accept you are gone
What I would give for the feel of your bearded face beneath
my hand and the brush of your lips on my cheek.
Copyright 2016 by Barbara Ehrentreu
Taken from: You’ll Probably Forget Me: Living With and Without Hal by Barbara Ehrentreu


In the hazy moments
between wake and sleep
I miss you
the texture of your beard
the hazel eyed sharpness
of your gaze on mine
the sound of soft snores
the circle of your arms
the place on your chest
chiseled from years to
fit my head and soaked
with tears when life
overstepped its boundaries
the quiet moments backed
with sounds of jazz or rock
and the joy of your smile
washing my day with
bright vermillion
you swept me into the
tornado of your life
and I held on tight
a willing passenger
as we careened
giddy and eager as it swirled
and I drifted in its debris
as you swallowed it all
and now I must search
for the pieces of me.
Copyright 2016 by Barbara Ehrentreu
Taken from: You’ll Probably Forget Me: Living With and Without Hal by Barbara Ehrentreu


I‘m in Starbucks
watching people
coupled and single
drinking, eating, together
or alone on computers or phones
and I remember those
days wanting to be alone
away from him when
things got too intense
and now my unused heart
pines for the time
when I knew I would see
his face and hear his voice
no matter what he said
always a part of him
Now I am like the lonely
swan mother who lost her mate
Uncoupled - alone in the
flow of life
Copyright 2016
Taken from: You’ll Probably Forget Me: Living With and Without Hal
by Barbara Ehrentreu

BARBARA EHRENTREU: Barbara Ehrentreu grew up in the United States in Brooklyn and moved to Queens. Her native language is English. She has lived and taught in Long Island, Buffalo, NY and Westchester, NY as well as a year in Los Angeles, CA. She has a Masters Degree in Reading and Writing K-12. Currently she is retired from teaching and living in Stamford, CT with her family. If I Could Be Like Jennifer Taylor won second prize in Preditors & Editors as Best Young Adult Book for 2011.  It was inspired by Paula Danziger for her children's writing workshop at Manhattanville College. Her second book, After, considers what can happen to a teen when her father becomes ill with a heart attack. It is based on her own experiences when her husband had a heart attack and the aftermath of what she and her family experienced. Barbara also writes poetry and has published a book, You’ll Probably Forget Me: Living With and Without Hal and several of her poems are published in the anthologies, Prompted: An International Collection of Poetry, Beyond the Dark Room, Storm Cycle and Backlit Barbell. She has a blog, Barbara's Meanderings, and she hosts a radio show on Blog Talk Radio, Red River Radio Tales from the Pages, once a month. She is a member of PEN Letters and SCBWI.


  1. Wonderful just wonderful poetry to read..

    1. Thank you so much, Deborah!!I am very pleased to be here!!

  2. Aww, thank you!! All of these poems were written after much sadness. Love you too, Caryn!!