Saturday, April 1, 2023



Just Tell Them I Shot Camelot Jack


Magic bullets,

I’m that good –

just tell them I shot Camelot Jack,

no need to get into specifics,

no one really cares about them anymore,

just tell them I did it and that should be good enough

to ride shotgun all the way to the moon –

tell them I was there as well,

installed a hot tub right on the surface

that produces nothing but strange rashes

and counterfeit twenties;

I’m an enterprising fellow –

ran guns to the Sandinistas with my trusty

white alpaca named Fletcher:

if anyone asks, just say you misplaced the evidence,

that I’m a long-time Castro enthusiast even

though I only liked his beard.

In The Future


there’s a robot comedian

who rips off his own head

7 nights a week,

tosses it into the air

yelling: HEADS UP!

before trying to catch it

without a head.

The rest of the show

is the body of the robot comedian

down on all fours,

trying to find its head

while the audience


The Night That Stuffed Wolf Fell Down From The Ceiling Onto The Ice


It was beginning to look like a rout.

The home team had just scored again.


A retractable stuffed wolf came out of the ceiling

as it did after each home team goal.


Only this time,

the stuffed wolf fell down from the ceiling

onto the ice below.


Two girls from the spirit squad

quickly skated out with shovels to remove

the stuffed wolf through an open Zamboni

door and the end of the rink.


The game resumed and the home team won,

but it was the fallen stuffed wolf that made the

Sudbury papers.


They would need a new stuffed wolf, pronto!

There was another home game the next night

and the fans expected a dead wolf to cheer about.




RYAN QUINN FLANAGAN is a Canadian-born author residing in Elliot Lake, Ontario, Canada with his wife and many bears that rifle through his garbage.  His work can be found both in print and online in such places as: Evergreen Review, The New York Quarterly, Our Poetry Archive, Setu, Literary Yard, and The Oklahoma Review.



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