Friday, July 1, 2022

NARGIS ISMAYILOVA

 


Metakadar (Metasadness)

 

Like the loneliness of Albert Camus My feelings for you are boundless… That's another thing -

Fully, something strange.

I feel it like the tip of my hair. Something is reddish.

It has no borders. Captivating me to you.

“Everyone knows that life is not worth living.

In fact, a person dies in his thirties or seventies - it does not matter”... You explain the arguments, it annoys me…

I dislike pennies, my irreplaceable…

Everyone perceives the love in various form, as well as death… Everyone perceives the soul in various form, as well as the passion… Making love can no longer silence the cry of the soul…

Why I must drag our stories into big genres when there is enough to suffocate you in small texts?

You look like a yellow color that suddenly splashes on the blackboard I drew. I do not see the Sun, do not expect optimistic fantasies from me, my dear!

 

Yellow reminds me of the face of TB society… Yellow makes me cold…

I'm not in looking for the sun, I do not see the sun, my dear…

I can only see the little hands begging in the corners. I feel cold coins  freeze the baby's palms…

I hate the smell of coin, my dear... The sound of coin make me mad...

Are those little hands opening towards the rays of the Sun? Tell me, my dear? Tell a lie that will soothe my despair… Say that all the children are very happy in this world...

Don't tell me the Sun cannot see them… Say they don't like the sun actually… My soul is burning, my soul is hurting…

The weak life in my anemic hands is not enough to warm all palms. I'm stuck in Virginia's despair…

All the rivers are drying up in my world …

All the stones in my pockets ring in my brain with irony like a penny. All men, all women, all people laugh at me!

Only the children are silent … all my pains turns Everest, I couldn`t explain metakadar to anyone...

I can't explain the pain of Hamsun's hunger to the world.

Days before I fit everything I wanted to say into the two cups of black tea. For me, in fact, you heard the things which I didn`t want to say...

 

Demon Roars With Laughter

After 101 Years Again

 

Swallows are flying from my soul To lands that I do not know...

Taking my loves, my pain, my regrets ... My pain spreads to foreign cities,

"People" no longer build cities in my heart… Bums snoozing on torn cardboard

- Darkness is in all my streets, loneliness is in all my roads ... Cracks in all my mirrors,

I`m losing Dear, I know

Your dislike losers,

You don`t care of beggars in their mother's arms ... No matter for you the fate of Chernobyl, Hiroshima ... You never be sensitive seeing a forgotten doll.

Your past never remain in your throat while eating cherries. The smell of Hermes in your palms,

Intricate stains on my soul ...

While you look at the world as Elon Musk shape, I am reading Javid over and over.

So, so, so...

Again, you are not interested in my topics ... You laugh at my troubles again, I know ...

You know, the lungs of the world are infected with cancer, Became myth the heroism of the Amazon women

No woman hums her baby lullabies – Curses take the place of petting

Tales not excite babies. As we forget,

We are globalizing,

Radioactive waste chews our souls. Our brains are full of worldly throws. Few minds criticize me every day

They do not say a word about Urmia, they are silent. Green is gradually losing its essence ...

The color of the seas turns red. A statue is erected to freedom,

peace pigeon gets to eat a hundred varieties, becomes a cookie.

My soul is smoking as coffee in your hand You smile neatly ...

My sorrows in your republic seem ridiculous, I know, you think a lot of people should die. As my soul wanders among the dimensions Sorrows drops from my  anger,

I hear

The moans of Afet

The smell of Hermes in your palms,

 

Intricate stains on my soul ...

While you look at the world as Elon Musk shape, I am reading Javid over and over.

Heavy curtains fall on your eyes, global fog while enveloping your soul

Demon roars with laughter after 101 years again

 

NARGIS ISMAYILOVA


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