BARBARA EHRENTREU

BARBARA EHRENTREU

A WALK DOWN THE PATH OF MY MEMORIES

I walked today upon the often trod path

its wooden slats once so comforting to me

in a time where my world had turned on its end

and I was searching for an answer to the pain

The vista surrounding me—a comfort for

my aching soul

I remembered standing near the railing

looking down at the scene below in the water

of the comings and goings of the sea birds

for whom this was home

and I was an interloper along with the

massive buildings and boats clogging

their access to the shoreline

A memory pierced my thoughts

of one particular day before I lost him

and before I had lost hope of

ever seeing him in his old self --

when I wandered onto the connecting

boardwalk with tears ready to be shed

and gazed into the depths of blue gray water

below me — hoping for a way to get through

the misery and praying for an answer that

would make him whole again

No answer came and I didn’t know it then

but the bubble of the dream we had together

was soon to pop and its pieces would scatter

as the ashes must have done when the Coast Guard

placed them into the depths of that bay in New Jersey

on a chilly October day when they handed me the flag

under which they had buried him and a framed map

of the place of the ash’s burial

But today was warm and sunny as spring finally

emerged from under its winter blanket

and I was able to walk the path twice

re-exploring the new brick part near the

restaurants where happy strangers

took advantage of this first day of fine weather

And I was thankful that though it is almost four years

that he is gone, my legs are stronger and my heart

has been patched enough to enjoy the day and

not to succumb to sorrow as we passed the place

on that path where benches lined the small inlet

where I used to watch the egret as you did

your New York Times puzzle

content to rest as we enjoyed the last moments

of peace — though I was ignorant that they were.

Copyright 2018 by Barbara Ehrentreu

SERENDIPITY

Sometimes you find yourself

in a space where you never

thought you would be

a moment when you

feel a kind of magic and

things feel like they are

touched with glitter

dust in an ordinary time

this exhilaration you feel

cannot be dissected

by an outsider for no one

really knows when it will

happen and suddenly

the boring life you were

leading has spectacularly

turned into a wild experience

and dreams appear and float

in the air as you calmly live

this tiny and momentary thrill

No one knows it is happening

to you yet inside you feel like

a bottle of sparkling water

bursting with happiness

and so much possibility

You have walked into serendipity

that sly operator who grabs

hold of you in a second and

changes a frown to a smile

moving you into a hopeful future.

copyright 2016 by Barbara Ehrentreu

SEASONAL MEMORIES BEGINNING

WITH SUMMER AS A SNOW GLOBE

Summer creates an illusion

from which we feel as if a

haze had descended upon us

and everything becomes a

little bit distorted from the

heat and the edge of sanity

that quickly can erupt

And I in my air-cooled life

peer out at the humanity

surrounding me with their

summer clothes, shorts and

bare shoulders and feel no

need to let my skin feel the sun

for the warmth of summer

with its short time span of

outdoor fun is not mine anymore

Once as a young woman, laden

with the trappings of mother

I watched as my offspring clamored

in the sunshine as sprinklers sprayed

rainbows into their lives

and as I grabbed their wet suit bodies

to bring them inside I felt the water

dripping on my dry clothes and

the joy of their cavorting seeped

into my heart as their laughter was

sealed forever in a snow globe

marked summer

where someday I could pick it up

tip it upside down and set it on

the empty space of my life to

view again the sheer joy of childhood

placed next to others of the different

seasons of their lives in an ever growing

set of occasions for happiness.

copyright 2016 by Barbara Ehrentreu

AURA OF POSSIBILITIES

The flower buds rise in front of me

from long thin green fronds

poised to open

about to burst forth with yellow

flowers seen poking from

a precocious one in the crowd

I stand to check it out

moving closer to see it

I have been sipping

my iced vanilla nonfat latte

in the time between appointments

on a bench near Starbucks

alone and alone in my heart

My thoughts ramble in the soft

breeze as I ponder living without you

A separation so painful it is

as if a limb were severed

The bleeding has stopped and

a scar formed over the cut

Yet I imagine you here

sitting beside me on the bench

probably doing the crossword

from the NY Times

on the page you tore

and folded to carry with you

or on your phone as you later did

my imaginary limb there once more

making the world full for me

like the time you were still here

when I felt complete and not

as if I were dangling in the air

But wait the garden speaks to me

“You are a bud waiting to open

and though some of mine have

withered and dried the strong live on”

and I knew I was in

the aura of possibilities.

copyright 2015 by Barbara Ehrentreu

BARBARA EHRENTREU

BARBARA EHRENTREU grew up in Brooklyn and moved to Queens. She has lived and taught in Long Island, Buffalo, NY and Westchester, NY as well as a year in Los Angeles, CA. She has a Masters Degree in Reading and Writing K-12. Currently she is retired from teaching and living in Stamford, CT with her family. If I Could Be Like Jennifer Taylor, her first novel, won second prize in Preditors & Editors as Best Young Adult Book for 2011. It was inspired by Paula Danziger for her children's writing workshop at Manhattanville College, and her second novel, After is now available in print. Barbara also writes poetry. She has a book called You’ll Probably Forget Me: Living With and Without Hal, which is a memorial to her deceased husband. Several of her poems are published in the anthologies, World Poetry Open Mic, several international anthologies, Queen, Prompted: An International Collection of Poetry, Beyond the Dark Room, Storm Cycle and Backlit Barbell. Her short screenplay, “The Kiss” won awards at film festivals. Barbara is a regular contributor to the Facebook page: “The Garden of Poetry and Prose” and Motivational Strips. She has a blog, Barbara's Meanderings, and hosts a radio show on Blog Talk Radio, Red River Radio Tales from the Pages, once a month. She is a member of Greenwich Pen Letters and SCBWI.